Monday, March 03, 2008

Duped by Good Charlotte? Don't Worry, I've got a $75 t shirt to sell you.

I think if you got into Good Charlotte when they came out, you can be forgiven. I’m sure you were young. They’ve been around for over 10 years now, so if you’re about 25 now, you were probably still in high school when you first heard the band.

Boy, I bet you feel stupid now.

And I’m not trying to diss you here. If you’ve realized your mistake, you may just be a pretty smart, well adjusted person. Lord knows I loved some shit in high school, but never anything as terrible as Good Charlotte.

I don’t know if there’s anyone else in the band other that the two ugly brothers with the tattoos. There probably is, but you’d never know it with those two creeps hogging the spotlight. I can see why you bought into it: tattooed pussies who “looked” like hard ass punks. Yeah, this would seem pretty cool to a 17 year old who hasn’t seen anyone else look like this. But now I’m betting most people who bought into Good Charlotte and the two ugly bastards who front it, are now feeling a bit ripped off.

Duped is more like it. You’ve been duped. Duped by some fame whoring, talent less twats who raped the current punk style and glued it to their crappy take on pop punk. The guys in Rancid saw these jack offs hit the stage and thought they were seeing themselves in some weird alternate reality they weren‘t aware of. Good Charlotte hit that stage and saw all you dollar signs sitting in the audience, buying their music and trying to be just like them.

The boys from Good Charlotte are more interested in selling you clothes than making music. That’s probably a good thing since they were so bad at making music in the first place. Third rate clothing has got to be better than fourth rate pop punk any day. The Madden brothers (the two uglies from Good Charlotte) have a clothing line (who doesn’t?) to cram down the throats of gullible teens these days. And that’s good considering their last album was a flop of monumental proportions. I guess when you’re too concerned with fashion, the music takes a hit.

And that’s why if you were into Good Charlotte, I think you were duped. Seeing pictures of these guys coming out of some store in LA with Paris Hilton and a bag containing goods worth more than any of their fans will make in six months lets me know that their whole punk thing was an act. They might have started out that way, but the second they made a tiny bit of money, they left that behind immediately to live their lives like the rich, spoiled Hollywood babies they were destined to be. Their “punk” look is just merely a costume now they put on to keep selling clothes and tickets to their shows.

Take for example the one GC brother who knocked up Nicole Richie. First of all, if you’re running in Nicole Richie’s cirlce, your “punk” gear looks like a costume anyway. Richie is a spoiled, LA party girl with no track record to the GC scene or any punk scene in general. How does this happen? Hey, if they like each other, that’s cool. Just don’t slap on your tattoos and black t shirt now because you’ve traded that all in the second you got with someone who is the antithesis of the genre you‘ve plundered. One of the GC brothers (we’ll call him Ugly Bastard 1 or UB1) was photographed at some “fashion week” event in a really nice suit and looking very subdued fashion wise. Very punk of you UB1, I’m sure all of your pop punk peers and fans were right there with you taking in all the great fashions. And come on, how lame is it that all of these musicians and rock stars are into “fashion.” Look, David Bowie I’ll give you. But how is it that some scumbags from Maryland who used punk and its clothing to catapult themselves to fame, suddenly find themselves ringside at a high falutin’ fashion show?

There is a disconnect with the fan base that happens eventually. The Rolling Stones milked it as long as they could but eventually knew that when they were jetting off to their homes in France or getting Knighted by the Queen, they couldn’t be singing about “working for the man” too much more. But GC and UB1 and UB2 want you to think they are still one of the people. They have the tattoos to prove it!

So if you bought into this lie, I’m sorry. Aping the style and hot music of the time has suckered in loads of people before you. GC was just one of the most recent to do it. Sure they’ll try to keep selling you on it (literally…they will sell you a $100 hoodie with some terrible print on it), but if you learned your lesson just move on and let these dicks fade into obscurity…counting money with tattooed fingers the whole way.