A Couple of Things...

I just saw that Knight Ridder sold for $4.5 billion and I was like, “holy shit! Somebody actually paid that much money for that fucking car!”

And then I realized they were talking about the newspaper publisher and I thought, “seriously, how much for the goddamned Knight Rider car?”

Have you seen the Chips AHoy commercial where the clay-mation punk rockers and a giant cookie sing “chunky chips Ahoy/ Oi! Oi! Oi!”?

This is just ridiculous. Does Nabisco (the makers of that dry, flavorless treat) know what Oi music is? If I was selling a product, I would not want it associated with Oi in the least. I did a quick search about it to see if anyone had written about the commercial and about a dozen myspace entries came up where some teenage (and not so teenage) dildos thought it was great. I’m offended by this commercial because Oi is typically associated with skinheads….and these know-nothing retards think it’s a good commerical.

Now before someone gets all over me, I’m not saying all skins are racist. I know quite a few who aren’t, but a lot of this shit goes hand in hand. And even if you remove the racist aspect to it, Oi certainly is an ass kicking, working class, street level music. Hardly the thing you would use to advertise cookies. But the majority of myspace morons don’t know this. They just think it’s punk rock…or the present day wuss version of punk rock. There is nothing more un-punk than using punk to sell cookies. If I have to say that again, I will shit myself. If you don’t hate this commercial on principle, you aren’t, never were, and never will punk to begin with.

If I was truly into Oi, I’d be very bummed out by this. The kids who claim to be punk today should be bummed by this yet are oddly amused by it. Parents who buy Chips Ahoy for their kids should at least know what is being used to sell to their children. I just hate it because it’s yet another thing that had no value to the “man” but now is being used to sell a product. What’s next? The shit and blood covered image of GG Allin selling toilet paper? I hope so.

And that leads me perfectly into my next point: the Sex Pistols and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I’m a little torn by this because one side of me thinks it’s great they told the Hall to shove it. Another part of me though thinks it’s awesome they’ve been given the recognition. I mean, seriously, they changed the world in my opinion and it’s amazing that such a shill of the record industry would honor them. Probably a direct reason there’s a fucking cookie commercial using Oi.

I want them to go because ol’ J. Rotten still has a lot to say and it would be great to see him tear some new ones while accepting the honor. But it wouldn’t be on their terms so I can see how he’d be reticent about going up there. There’s nothing worse than getting trapped into something like that and not getting to say your piece. So I guess it’s for the best that they said “fuck you” to the Hall of Fame. Because as I’ve mentioned above, punk rock’s history has been so watered down and convoluted that no matter what they did, seeing the Sex Pistols in an environment such as the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame might just make me go out and buy some cookies.

Black Sabbath on the other hand, is being inducted and this is perfect for them. They were always supposed to be an arena rock band and this fits them to a T. The only thing that would make one of my favorite band’s induction the best is if all the people who have stolen Sabbath’s riffs over the years would have to come on stage and give them blowjobs. Billy Corgan is going to have his mouth full that night!

JR